How To Get Out Of A Toxic Environment
We all know that it is recruitment season and as usual Linkedin is alive with tips on how to position yourself for greatness, pose with those certificates and land that new job! I, however, do think that this also happens to be the perfect time to write this piece on helping people to get out of toxic workplaces or environments which is equally important.
Workplaces and environments can become toxic for varying reasons including staff relationship, work stagnation, work stress/pressure, insufficient remuneration and sometimes just low morale.
I have found myself in this situation and I can tell you that it takes a lot mentally and even physically to make the decision to leave and actually get it done. It is quite a task and one that must be done early especially because it may lead to severe burnouts, depression, anxiety and a host of other conditions, you are better off avoiding.
A quick disclaimer before we start though, I am not a counsellor, coach, motivational speaker, agony aunty or any of those certified roles. There will be no number to Call for further information after this piece, it ends here. Okay, let us get into it!
It starts with you: One thing I quickly realised trying to get out of a toxic environment once, was that I was the one who needed the most convincing. I was so used to the perks of the environment that I was willing to suck it up and keep managing at the expense of my mental health. Nkan buruku (Yoruba for terrible things). I had a decent role that came with pretty decent benefits, I mean who would want to give that up? I knew I needed a break, I knew I needed to slow down, but I kept managing. Before I knew it, one extra month became two, then three and four till it became a full year, can you believe it? By the time I finally got to it, I was on a daily dose of painkillers for breakfast, lunch and dinner and got horribly burnt out. Before it gets here, please have an honest conversation with yourself. If the environment is not safe, healthy, or even decent enough for you, then you must leave.
The Perks Will End, Get Ready For It: Remember you are trying to get out of an environment, which basically means that you cannot take their goodies with you. This will hurt a bit especially if your ‘next move’ does not have any of these or even worse if you are going on a much-needed break from the corporate world. These things could be anything from money to all-expense-paid trips, gadgets etc. Okay, I take that back it will hurt a lot! But when comparing it with the peace of mind you need, it is worth it. Also please do not engage in some of the very foolish visualisation games I did that year. Some things are not the same, Wild Wadi Waterparks and Erin Ijesha, same applies to Table Mountain and Gurara Falls, very very different, but I digress… The point is to be focused and ready.
Don’t Burn Bridges: This is really important, important; the way people just waltz back into your life after you are confident that you left them in your old company is nothing short of a wonder! Even if your old boss is funny when you are leaving, be firm in your decision to leave but never rude or nasty. It is true that you never know where you will meet again and nobody wants those really awkward moments.
Of course, this can be tough when you are desperate to leave, at that point, you are not thinking of any bridge, you just want to leave. Patience and firmness are what you need here, they will come in hand, use them.
Get A Support System. A great team will be very useful in making a successful exit and I will not take them for granted if I were you. You will need a confidant; you know one of those people who will have your back and firmly help you get through this? Exactly! You must select this person carefully and make sure they understand how important it is for you to do this. You do not want someone that will abandon you when you become a pain and trust me you will be. This is someone who is experienced and can guide you through the process while helping you to objectively assess the situation, there is a proverb about. My preference will be a mentor or career coach. Then there is the Cheerleading Squad, my personal favourites! Even though they play a more ceremonial role; they are basically your ‘feel good’ people. Think of them as folks who accompany musicians, you know the entourage of people who follow them everywhere? You want to make sure that they can tell you the truth when necessary but make sure you have them to cheer you on every step of the way. You will be surprised how useful these folks are!
Detach Fully. Now, this is an interesting one, such a slippery slope…You know how you build your entire world around a place? Aaarrrggghhh.That thing is such a bad idea! Don’t do it. Resist the urge to engage in such negative talk. UnfortunatelyUnfortunately, you don’t know how bad it is, till you’re in this kind of situation. Please don’t leave and spend your entire day on the phone with your ex-colleagues discussing
the exact issues that made you leave in the first place. Let bygones be bygones, don’t leave and now become the external news correspondent NOT COOL.
Get Ready For Uncertainty. Things will be different which is absolutely normal with change. Don’t panic, ease into it. You will be fine in the end. Shut the door on the many negative thoughts that may flood your mind. This is not the time to relive your ‘had I known memories’ (Does anyone still say that?). Things will be different but focus on the future and do not look back.
Wow, this is way more than I anticipated. Maybe I should have just made it an online class. Yes? No? Never mind. Seriously though if you follow these steps in no particular order you should be fine. I do hope you find this beneficial. If you find this useful, no you don’t need to donate, but you can drop a comment below, add a few tips and share with everyone you know.
